Our adoption Story - Kyrgyzstan

There are a list of things that need to be done now that we are in the DOSSIER stage of our adoption. The agency has our old dossier from Vietnam and with any luck a majority of those documents will be useful.

I have been lucky enough to have someone, that knows me and my husband very well, in the states whom is a Notary Public and has our signatures on record. I sent this morning a pile of papers to her to notarise.

With this done, the only two documents missing would be:
1. The amended I-171H form from the CIS
2. A FBI Identity Clearance

Our social worker is sending the new home studies as we speak. I only pray that we can use what is left from the old dossier and that all of this goes smoothly. I feel like we have had enough bumps already.

The new agency is nice enough, but harder to reach than LNI. I miss the family feeling at LNI, but in all fairness we were with them for more than a year. If only I could have some sign of hope in the near future.

I don't believe in fate. If I did I would have to give up on the idea of free will, which is God's first promise to us. However I want to think, from time to time, that there is a plan. But logically I know there is not. What I do believe is that bad things can happen to good people and it is no one's fault, But God is there to guide us through the darker times so that we may find some solace. I can only hope that God is guiding us now through our loss in Vietnam towards some comfort and joy. His intention may not have been Vietnam, nor Kyrgyzstan for our son, but I believe that he respects his promise of free will and is doing what he can to save our hearts from another disappointment.

We've seen the notary, signed the contract, sent the home study and paperwork to USCIS for updating. We've sent the bank information to our bank and requested the wire transfer to go through.

Looks like we are on our way. I have spoken with our agency about the aparent hold up and they claim that they are not affected. I will have to take thier word for it. It's not like there is much of a choice.

Some things could be more reassuring but for the moment I'm a little stressed out. I need something positive to happen... and soon.

I have folded my 1000th paper crane, now I have to wait and see if my wish will come true. By June 20th, if the cranes work, we will have a referral.

If not, I guess I'll fold another 1000. I don't know what else to do. I might even keep folding just to keep the tradition and my hands busy.

Mother's Day (French Culture - the one we celebrate at home) is Sunday. I want to take a moment and get something nice for Florence (Mother in Law) since she will be with us starting tomorrow.

Oh if only ... if only. *sigh* if only something would happen.

Ok, one of the reasons we chose Kyrgyzstan was the apparent lack of problems. After the fiasco with Vietnam we couldn't bare another. Yet here we are... moments away from signing the contract and coughing up the non-refundable 16k and the Embassy of Kyrgyz Rep. is still not accepting dossiers!!!!!!!!!

One thing is sure... i'm not signing anything until I get a straight answer from the agency and some sort of promise. Enough is enough right? Are we supposed to jump in blind and stupid too?

The agency contract is already bad enough... not promising any more than to "try" and keeping our money if they fail. But do they really expect me to join the ranks of unsure parents the way other agencies blind sided those unforunate families for Vietnam whom applied after January??????

I hope not. Oh God I pray not!

That is the distance from London to Kyrgyzstan.

Seems so little when you think about it. Most Americans drive more than that in a single year. So why does it feel so far away.

Also, I have folded my 999th paper crane. Only one more to go, but I am saving it for the day we sign our adoption contract with the new agency. I was supposed to get the contract by email today, but it hasn't arrived. I am hoping for more luck tomorrow.

Just thought you would like to know that I posted some photos of Kyrgyzstan in my media files.

I'll be adding links and some country information soon.

It's been a rough few weeks here at home. Tensions are high, expectations low and a general sentiment of disappointment. We failed to complete our adoption from Vietnam after a year of waiting. I have blogged the whole thing across two blogs (one personnel and the other adoption related). You would think that after a year I'd be ready to throw in the towel and head for barefoot and pregnant status. But I'm not that easily pushed into the bushes!

(I can't think of anything more repulsive than being pregnant again - you might find this shocking but it is how I feel about my body... not anyone else’s. However wouldn’t trade my daughter for anything in the world and I am happy had her.)

When we got the news that Vietnam was a dead end for us, we knew it was coming, but it was still a shock. It was like the sun had set on our hopes and dreams. But Chris stood fast and brought me back to reality... Vietnam is not the only place in the world.  We started by begging our agency to find us another program that would accept us but they hadn't a single working program that would. We are now in the position of leaving an agency we love and have made, in many ways, a part of our family.

Once the initial separation anxiety gone, we started to scour the internet for a new option. We have a few special criteria for agencies and countries so many were excluded in advance. First we wanted to be able to choose the sex of our child. We want a boy; we already have a girl and don't see the need for another right now. Second, after some really really long conversations, we want a child from Asia. With physical traits as close as possible to my brother (Korean/Indian) & Christophe's Sensei (Vietnamese). We have a deep love for Asia in all its forms and we want to adopt a child that wouldn't feel so completely different in our family.

Many Asian countries wouldn't have us but we came across a few articles about old soviet provinces close to Mongolia, China and Eastern Russia. Notably, Kyrgyzstan. A country, until now I had forgotten and ignored. After some research we feel like this may just be the culture that would fit our family. The children don't look like Vietnamese children at all, but the mix of Mongolian, Russian and Kurd does have some resemblance to my brother's unique traits. A detail I am particularly sensitive to.

It is now with great hope and desire that we move forward with our adoption, but this time we are more tempered and ready for the unpleasant possibilities. I want this one to stick... but I will be ready this time if it doesn’t. In any case, if Kyrgyzstan shows any signs of trouble... I'm not sticking around this time. Burnt once... not twice.